Domestic Geek

Have you ever had a dream where you won the lottery and then reality hit you hard in the face when you woke up that you hadn't? I did this morning. That's how my day started. My mom was also in the dream (very much alive and well), so that hurt, too. I was so bummed when I woke up (two hours early) that I couldn't get back to sleep. Then I find the dog in my craft room, no word as to whether I'm ever going to be full time at work, forgot to send my Netflix movie back so I could get Pirates of the Carribean for the weekend, diarrhea on my carpet, poop on my great aunt's heirloom quilt, my shower is leaking and I don't have the money to go buy parts, I'm a burden on Marcus, there's no money for Christmas presents again this year, I want to bake Christmas cookies but I don even have enough money to buy regular food...I'm at the end of my rope.

I've been trying to not vent this stuff here because I've been trying to be more positive about life, but today was bad. While I was scrubbing the carpet, I just lost it. The huge feeling of hopelessness just overcame me and I started bawling. I'm just so tired of bad things. I'm at the same point I was last year. I don't want Christmas to come at all.

OK, I'm having a crappy day and need some humor. Since I haven't posted any funny things I've found lately, here's one I've seen around and most recently at Geeks Make Me Hot:

Please join me in remembering a great icon of the entertainment community.

The Pillsbury Doughboy died yesterday of a yeast infection and trauma complications from repeated pokes in the belly. He was 71.

Doughboy was buried in a lightly greased coffin. Dozens of celebrities turned out to pay their respects, including Mrs. Butterworth, Hungry Jack, the California Raisins, Betty Crocker, the Hostess Twinkies, and Captain Crunch.

The grave site was piled high with flours.

Aunt Jemima delivered the eulogy and lovingly described Doughboy as a man who never knew how much he was kneaded. Doughboy rose quickly in show business, but his later life was filled with turnovers. He was not considered a very smart cookie, wasting much of his dough on half-baked schemes.

Despite being a little flaky at times he still was a crusty old man and was considered a positive roll model for millions.

Doughboy is survived by his wife Play Dough, two children, John Dough and Jane Dough, plus they had one in the oven. He is also survived by his elderly father, Pop Tart.

The funeral was held at 3:50 for about 20 minutes.

On a serious note, the Pillsbury site has some cute holiday downloads, such as recipe cards, gift tags, cookie exchange invitations, etc.

I hate scrubbing sh*t out of the carpet! It's a good thing The Office is on tonight so I can get a little humor. It will probably not be as good as last year's, but it better not suck.

I've always loved the look of real stained glass. Not the fake stuff I've made in the past with tissue paper and glue or Gallery Glass paints, but real stained glass. It's really expensive if you buy it from someone already made.

When I used to work at AutoZone, the wife of one of my coworkers made and sold stained glass for a living. She did really gorgeous, amazing work and displayed it at many of the area craft malls. Apparently, it's not that difficult if you have to right supplies and tools. As long as I wore heavy gloves and eye protection while cutting the glass, even an accident prone person such as myself wouldn't get hurt doing it. Anyway, she kept saying she would teach me how to do it (for a small fee), but I never got around to it. She and her husband divorced and she moved away.

I lost my chance at cheap lessons and the use of her stained glass cutters, but it's still an art that I would to try. I've been noticing that it's one of the hobbies that is beginning to make a resurgence lately. The craft stores are beginning to carry more stained glass supplies than they used to. I'll have to look into finding if there are other relatively inexpensive classes offered that I can take. It would be a shame to invest a lot of money into getting the necessary supplies only to find that I didn't like doing it.

Yay, I came home from work to diarrhea all over my carpet. Joy. The poor old dog walked back and forth through it, too. It is EVERYWHERE. I guess I get to spend the next couple of hours with a steam cleaner and a scrub brush. I am so not looking forward to this.

Last night he got confused and ended up stuck back here in my craft/computer room. He must've gotten pretty freaked out trying to find the way out because it looked like a tornado hit this place this morning. He pulled my Wacom off the desk, which brought my desk organizer full of tacks, paper clips and my earrings tumbling to the floor. I still haven't found a couple of the earrings, but I did manage to find a thumbtack with my bare foot. *sigh*