Domestic Geek

Today sucked.

I'm not going to rehash all the crap that happened today. I'm pretty sure from my understanding of the law of attraction that I went into this week expecting the worst and I've manifested it.

I will say that I have either caught the cold going around work or I am having a bad reaction to the mosquito bites I got yesterday playing with the new powerwasher outside. I totally forgot the bug spray first.

Also, my right wrist and forearm are killing me. I can barely mouse, which stinks because I want to work on my template design and get my graphic design site up so I can hopefully get some more clients and make the money I need to get to Vegas. Checking my email when I got home from work almost brought me to tears.

I just got up from a 3 hour nap (thankfully Marcus came home), so I hope that doesn't hinder my ability to sleep this evening.

I've got a dull pain pounding in my temple, so I'm going to go take some ibuprofin and scrounge a bit of leftover meatloaf for dinner. Remember when meatloaf used to be the cheap meal make? Yeah, with beef at $2.50/lb, I guess those days are over.

Ok, I said the other day we needed a powerwasher and today Marcus bought one! I cleaned the wheel wells on my car, washed crap off the outside of the house and since it was an electric model I even brought it inside to tackle the soap scum in our shower. w00t! That thing is cool!

Man, I had the WORST headache when I got off work today. Actually, it started around noon. Smart me would've gone upstairs to get Advil out of the First Aid box, but I kept putting it off. Of course, I got stuck working on a mind numbing project and ended up staying an hour extra. It wasn't until 5pm when I finally got home and took some pain relievers. I took to my bed to let the stuff take effect and next thing I know, it's 7:30. We had a really big rain storm apparently and I didn't hear a thing.

Well, Marcus will be home soon. At least the headache has receded for now. I've got a bit of sinus pressure, though. I'd better go see if I've got any sinus stuff about.

I forgot to mention this, but yesterday my supervisor was hinting about something happening in two weeks. He said something about help coming for the archiving part of my job. I couldn't get him to elaborate, though. Am I being given more responsibilities? Will I get a raise? I don't know and it's driving me mad!

What sucks is I can't pester him all next week about it because he's going to be on vacation. Dang it!

Keep your fingers, eyes and toes crossed that it is a raise. A big raise.

An old friend from college (who is a little older than I) told me a few years ago that when I passed 40, my life would get way better. She told me that it's like a magic age where all of a sudden the petty crap that plagues you earlier in life just doesn't matter anymore. It's when you start to discover who you are and really begin living life. You reprioritize (is that even a word?) what's truly important.

Honestly, I didn't really believe her.

Now that I'm less than a month away from my 41st birthday, I finally see what she meant. I don't dwell on piddly stuff like I used to. I've taken an attitude of, "Hey, this is who I am. Take it or leave it. I really don't care what you think of me." I'm starting to find that stuff is less important than experiences (except for computer stuff, that is!).

Granted, having been blessed with finding a man that loves me and sticks with me no matter what has been the most wonderful thing that could've happened to me. I can totally be who I am with him and be totally comfortable. I am grateful for his strength and his wisdom. He truly is my soul mate. I pity women who are afraid for their fellas to see them naked or without their makeup. I can not imagine being in a relationship where you can not discuss things and have intelligent conversations. How sad that some partners can not even show their true selves.

I still have a lot of negative self-talk and chatter that goes on in my brain, but more and more I'm recognizing it for what it is and trying to let it go. I have lots of big plans for me in the near future. I'm finally beginning to believe I can make them a reality.