My friend Chrissy will appreciate this (found at ASV):
A font walks into a bar.
The bartenders says: "Hey, we don't serve your type in here!"
The bartenders says: "Hey, we don't serve your type in here!"
Monday, November 15, 2004
Mon
15
Nov
2004
2004
Tuesday, November 09, 2004
Tue
9
Nov
2004
2004
I know some people who could use this as a reference:
| BEER TROUBLESHOOTING CHART | ||
|---|---|---|
| SYMPTOM | FAULT | ACTION |
| Feet cold and wet. | Glass being held at incorrect angle. | Rotate glass so that open end points toward ceiling. |
| Feet warm and wet. | Improper bladder control. | Stand next to nearest dog, complain about house training. |
| Beer unusually pale and tasteless. | Glass empty. | Get someone to buy you another beer. |
| Opposite wall covered with fluorescent lights. | You have fallen over backward. | Have yourself leashed to bar. |
| Mouth contains cigarette butts. | You have fallen forward. | See above. |
| Beer tasteless, front of your shirt is wet. | Mouth not open, or glass applied to wrong part of face. | Retire to restroom, practice in mirror. |
| Floor blurred. | You are looking through bottom of empty glass. | Get someone to buy you another beer. |
| Floor moving. | You are being carried out. | Find out if you are being taken to another bar. |
| Room seems unusually dark. | Bar has closed. | Confirm home address with bartender. |
| Taxi suddenly takes on colorful aspect and textures. | Beer consumption has exceeded personal limitations. | Cover mouth. |
| Everyone looks up to you and smiles. | You are dancing on the table. | Fall on somebody cushy-looking. |
| Beer is crystal-clear. | It's water. Somebody is trying to sober you up. | Punch him. |
| Hands hurt, nose hurts, mind unusually clear. | You have been in a fight. | Apologize to everyone you see, just in case it was them. |
| Don't recognize anyone, don't recognize the room you're in. | You've wandered into the wrong party. | See if they have free beer. |
| Your singing sounds distorted. | The beer is too weak. | Have more beer until your voice improves. |
| Don't remember the words to the song. | Beer is just right. | Play air guitar. |
Saturday, October 30, 2004
Sat
30
Oct
2004
2004
While perusing Adam Curry's site today, I found this link for the new Ashlee Simpson Karaoke Edition iPod.
Monday, September 13, 2004
Mon
13
Sep
2004
2004
As seen in the MarcusLingl.net forums:
10 Dog Peeves About Humans
- Blaming your farts on me... not funny... not funny at all!
- Yelling at me for barking.. I'M A FRIGGIN' DOG YOU IDIOT!
- Taking me for a walk, then not letting me check stuff out. Exactly whose walk is this, anyway?
- Any trick that involves balancing food on my nose... stop it!
- Any haircut that involves bows or ribbons. Now you know why we chew your stuff up when you're not home.
- The sleight of hand, fake fetch throw. You fooled a dog! Woooohoooooooo! What a proud moment for the top of the food chain.
- Taking me to the vet for "the big snip," then acting surprised when I freak out every time we go back!
- Getting upset when I sniff the crotches of your guests. Sorry, but I haven't quite mastered that handshake thing yet.
- Dog sweaters. Hello?? Haven't you noticed the fur?
- How you act disgusted when I lick myself. Look, we both know the truth: you're just jealous.
Saturday, July 31, 2004
Sat
31
Jul
2004
2004
Oh, before I forget--I wanted to post these links.
First, the Starbucks Doubleshot Survivor commercial (Marcus' new favorite commercial) linked on the Starbucks website and at Kontraband.com.
Glen! Glen, Glen, Glen!
Second, the Foamy Rant about Starbuck's beverage sizes.
They're both pretty funny.
First, the Starbucks Doubleshot Survivor commercial (Marcus' new favorite commercial) linked on the Starbucks website and at Kontraband.com.
Glen! Glen, Glen, Glen!
Second, the Foamy Rant about Starbuck's beverage sizes.
They're both pretty funny.
Name: LaDonna
LaDonna is the #687 most common female first name. 0.016% of females in the US are named LaDonna. Around 19,600 US females are named LaDonna!
source: namestatistics.com (no longer online)
source: namestatistics.com (no longer online)
|
LOCATION: Black Hills, SD DOB: September 11 SEX: Female |
SIGN: Virgo STATUS: Shacking Up FAV COLOR: Green |
