Domestic Geek

I've blocked and/or try not to think about a lot of things that happened in my youth. As I was going through a box of Mom's old craft supplies that I had back in my craft room, I found some stuff that made me remember: I used to be a Camp Fire Girl.

I didn't even want to be one. All of my friends were Girl Scouts (Brownies). I got stuck being a Bluebird because then my sister could join, too. She wasn't old enough to be a Brownie yet. Except for a week-long horseback riding camp that I went to one summer and that I got to learn archery, I don't have any good memories of that time. In fact, except for my sister, I couldn't name a single person in that picture. We stayed involved as long as we did because it was really Mom's thing. She was a group leader, candy chairman, day camp leader, etc. I just remember being an outcast everywhere I went. I was the shy, fat girl that nobody wanted around. I hated selling candy door-to-door. I was so grateful when Mom got involved in the music stuff we were doing and we didn't have time for Camp Fire anymore.

It makes me a little sad now when I try to dredge up memories of what I accomplished in those many years I did that and I can't really come up with much. It is just one more example of having gone through the motions doing something I didn't want to do for the sake of someone else.

I have this amazingly goofy habit. Almost every morning I leave the house with a plastic glass of some sort of beverage (tea, water, etc.) to have something to sip as I drive. Everytime I get home, I totally forget to take the glass inside with me. The next morning, I move the empty glass to the backseat to make room for the new one,,,and on and on it goes until I either have to clean the car out for some reason (mechanic, passengers) or I run out of glasses in the house.

I guess I'm back in an insomnia phase. It took me hours to go to sleep last night and yet here I am—wide awake at 7:00 am. *sigh* I hope I can get a nap in today or get to sleep early tonight or I'm not going to do well at work on Monday.

It snowed a little last night. Tomorrow is the first day of Spring. I really, really, really wish the weather would warm up for good. The teaser of warm weather we had a couple of weeks back sucked. Perfect weather. I loved it. Now this. Oh, well.

Well, I've got Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire and The Return of Spinal Tap to watch from Netflix today. I think I'll set my laptop up back in the craft room and watch while I clean. That room is a disaster area. I'm going to turn it into my home office, so I won't get distracted (as much) when I get some freelance work. I debated about turning the bunny room into my office, but they have too much hair and dander flying around in there to be good for my computer stuff.

I've had nothing to say here lately. As a matter of fact, I'm totally bored with the Internet, too. I don't know why. I look at my link list, hit a couple of sites, then I'm done.

I do have a humorous story from work.

One of our clients is a vacuum shop owner who is a total practical joker. When his sales rep brought me his proof on Wednesday, it said my ad was crap and it totally needed to be redone. I panicked because there was no notes as to what he didn't like, what needed to be changed, etc. As I'm having total heart failure, she pulls the "Real Proof" out from behind her back and I started cracking up! He loved the ad! I had totally forgot who I was dealing with or I would've seen through the "fake proof" thing. Oh, well. I really needed a good laugh.

I'm getting several responses from clients claiming to love my work. I guess I really am good at this! I've gotten permission from Head of Graphics to put some ads in my portfolio, so as soon as that gets up, I'll point you guys to it. I'm definitely underpaid for what I bring to the table. There were hints from him and the owner that maybe I won't have to wait the whole 6 months for a raise. We'll see. So, I guess I'm off to bed so I can work on getting my portfolio online tomorrow. I really need to $$$ coming in.

Marcus had the web server down for upgrades for most of the weekend and I had all of this stuff I kept thinking I wish I could post. Now that the server is back, I can't remember a single one of those things. *sigh*

I saw a cool video on VH1 Classic yesterday. It was DMC's (featuring Sarah McLachlan) "Just Like Me." Sarah sings "Cats in the Cradle" behind DMC rapping about being adopted. I need to get that song. There is a weird remix of it on iTunes, but I'll try to find the version they had on the tv. I wonder if it will be on iTunes eventually.

I had lunch with my friend from Platt yesterday at Panera. I IM with her at work occasionally, but it was good to see her in person. I really cut myself off from all of my friends. I decided I needed to start being more social.

Now that I can't really bitch about how much I hate my job, I don't have a heck of a lot to post anymore. I'm slowly trying to rebuild the shambles that all of that depression and self-loathing I had back at the end of last year created in my life. I'm eating better, getting more sleep, generally taking better care of myself. I can't hardly eat fast food anymore. We went to A&W for dinner last night and the chili cheese fries and root beer float actually made me feel kind of ill. I don't drink pop hardly anymore at all.

I decided that I have to make my dream of doing freelance design work a reality. I need more income coming in NOW. I also don't know if I'm going to stay at my current job for the long term because if I don't get a substantial pay increase at my six-month review, I can't continue to work there. I knew I was going to have to take entry-level pay to start, but I'm worth a whole lot more than that. This place also has no benefits package whatsoever and the drive SUCKS (even with carpooling). We'll see.

Well, guess I need to go. Marcus is still doing web server stuff and I need to post this before I lose it.