Domestic Geek

Business is slow at a bar one night when all of a sudden a strange man walks in, carrying a bag. The man walks up to the bartender, takes a seat at the bar and beckons to the tender, calling his attention. "I'll bet you all of tonight's drinks that I can make you cry like a baby," the strange man says. In reply, the bartender chuckles, "Yeah sure, why not? You're not going to hit me or anything, are you?" he asks. The man shakes his head, "No, no, of course not," he replies, emptying the bag's contents onto the bartop. From the bag tumbles a little midget, just a little more than a foot tall, and a piano. The midget begins to play beautiful, beautiful music and it's so fantastic that the bartender soon breaks down and cries. Later, over the third round of free drinks, the bartender asks, "Okay, I gotta know, where'd you get that little guy?" The man at the bar leans in close, so that no one else can hear and answers, "I found a ring that will grant anyone three wishes." "Three wishes?" exclaims the bartender. "You gotta let me use at least one, man, come on, I won't tell anyone else, just let me use one!" With a sigh, the man hands over an ornate ring. The bartender slips it on his finger, closes his eyes and murmurs his wish. Suddenly, a duck wanders into the bar, followed by another, then another, and another. Soon, the tavern is flooded with ducks to the point where not even the midget can move without bumping one. "What the hell?" cries the bartender. "I wished for a million bucks! Not a million ducks!" The man at the bar chuckles a little. "I forgot to warn you..." he begins. "The ring is kind of, well... hard of hearing" "Hard of hearing? You mean like you have a deaf wishing ring?" questions the bartender. The man just chuckles and nods in reply. "Well, did you really think I wished for a twelve inch pianist?"